Bubblehammerblog

West Yorkshire Police has taken the initiative of sending out patrols around city & town centre pubs accompanied by small, specially trained dogs, to sniff out members of the public who might be in possession of drugs. This means specifically cannabis, since other drugs are much more difficult to detect. Television reports suggest that the move has been popular with the public, especially pub landlords & managers. 'It's a good idea', one landlord said in an interview. 'It puts our minds at rest.' Seems the dogs wear badges that warn dopefiends not to be misled by their cuteness.

What is this country, the most spied-upon on the planet, becoming? Years of sneakily authoritarian governments has softened up the population to the point where most will abandon what's left of their privacy & civil liberties without a whimper. If you're not terrorist or a criminal, the argument goes, you've nothing to fear. No one who has lived through, or paid attention to, what has happened from the 20th century onwards should swallow this. But as I've said before, we're becoming people without memory. The healthy suspicion & wariness of authority that makes real democracy possible is being worn away by small increments. Listen: the State is a misfortune we reluctantly put up with. Your mind will be at rest when you're dead.

The State is going to monitor your phone calls, your emails & what you look at on the Net. For the first time in history the collection & storage of vast volumes of data, along with ways & means of interrogating it, has become technically easy. Your car registration number will be used to monitor your comings & goings. Your credit card will reveal what you buy. From next year the State will open a database, called 'Contact Point', that will detail the lives of your children from birth. The silence of Joe the Plumber on these matters is taken for consent. Klaus Bubblehammer the Disaffected Troublemaker would rather take his chances with terrorists & criminals.

Because Joe the Plumber didn't object to the police sniffing the pockets of harmless dope smokers out on the town for a few beers, ( & yes, because the tokers are too disorganised to deploy the simple tactic of smearing cannabis oil over pub furniture, to fox the dogs), the next step will be for the State to send out the cops with equipment to read the RFID chips embedded in the various devices people carry in their pockets, which will indicate where you where, at what time, & who with - all of which will be added to your database entry. Is that alright for you then?

& now for something completely different.

So far Notts Forest has only managed to win two matches all season, the second just last weekend, & they remain at the bottom of the Championship, or Second Division. What's happening here? Not so long ago Nottingham Forest was the best, & most exciting team in Europe. And they managed to become so without mercenaries or megastars. All the players were Scottish, Irish, or English, though there might've been the odd Dutchman. When Brian Clough signed the forward Gary Birtles he was working as a plasterer on a building site, & Clough warned him that if he didn't shape up he'd be clocking on again on Monday morning.

Which brings me to Blackpool. I have a notion, that could earn me lots of money, to bring back the tangerine Glory Days of Blackpool FC. I want to buy the club from the cretins who currently own it, & invest enough money for the club to reinvent itself. The potential supporters are already there - all the disaffected Man United & City, Liverpool, Everton, Bolton, & all the Lancashire hinterland, would rally to a club playing exciting football. The city of Blackpool has lost its bid to host one of New Labour's sinister & halfbaked 'supercasinos', so the football club is ripe for development. The project could be kicked off by putting together an 'all stars' team, a bit like Fulham attempted in the 80's with Best, Rodney Marsh etc., but with a better plan & more commitment. Interested investors should contact kbubblehammer@yahoo.co.uk

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